PATRIOTIC OR HURT?
- Madhukar Dama
- Apr 14
- 4 min read
SETTING:
Evening. The five youngsters sit in a half-circle outside Madhukar’s mud home. A soft wind stirs the neem leaves. Silence wraps around them until the Hermit speaks.
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MADHUKAR (smiling)
So, tell me, my dear lions of the land — what burns in your chest?
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RAHUL (voice rising)
We are tired of insults to our nation, sir!
People speak against our army, our flag, our culture.
We won’t stay silent!
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NEHA (fist clenched)
We don’t care if we lose friends.
The nation comes first. Always.
Enemies must be silenced.
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MADHUKAR
Hmm.
Enemies.
Tell me… have you ever met one?
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ARUN
Of course!
Anyone who speaks ill of the country… they’re traitors!
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MADHUKAR (gently)
So you’ve never spoken ill of yourself?
Of your home?
Of your own mother or father, in moments of pain?
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SANA (softly)
We don’t speak against India.
We are proud Indians.
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MADHUKAR (softly)
Pride is a beautiful fruit.
But it cannot grow in the soil of pain.
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RAHUL (shaken)
Pain?
We’re not weak.
We’re warriors.
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MADHUKAR
Then let’s speak like warriors.
What happened…
before you chose the flag as your shield?
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NEHA (resisting)
Nothing happened.
I just love my country.
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MADHUKAR (calmly)
Do you love your own heart?
Your loneliness?
The night you cried because no one understood you?
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(A silence falls. A few eyes turn away.)
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MADHUKAR (continues)
Children raised without affection often choose a country to worship.
Because it doesn’t scold.
It doesn’t leave.
It doesn’t ask them to clean their room.
It just stands there — tall, proud, perfect.
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ARUN (voice cracks)
My father always said I was nothing.
But when I wore the tricolour on stage, he finally clapped.
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SANA (quietly)
When I post patriotic reels, people cheer.
When I share poems of pain, they ignore.
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MADHUKAR
So you found applause in the anthem…
when silence answered your pain.
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NEHA (defensive)
So what if we found something to believe in?
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MADHUKAR
Belief is sacred.
But when it is used to bury a wound,
it becomes a bandage that never breathes.
And wounds that never breathe… rot.
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RAHUL (softly)
Then what do we do with this fire in us?
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MADHUKAR
Don’t throw it at others.
Sit with it.
Ask it — “What are you trying to burn away?”
Is it shame?
Loneliness?
Rejection?
Powerlessness?
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SANA
And then?
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MADHUKAR
Then you take that same fire…
and you light lamps in your village.
You build libraries.
You feed the hungry.
You save water.
You heal what’s real.
That is love of nation.
Not rage at shadows.
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ARUN (tearfully)
I thought if I shouted loud enough,
my father would be proud.
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MADHUKAR
Then shout at the mountain, Arun.
Shout your sadness.
But don’t mistake noise for patriotism.
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NEHA (whispering)
So… we’re not bad?
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MADHUKAR
No, child.
You’re just hurt.
And hurting people often wear the flag
so no one sees their scars.
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(A long pause. The neem tree rustles again. The sun is setting.)
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MADHUKAR (smiling gently)
Let your love for the nation begin
with love for the nation within.
You.
Your body.
Your breath.
Your story.
Heal that land first.
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WHAT IS A COPING MECHANISM?
A coping mechanism is something the mind uses to reduce inner pain, fear, or confusion —
Instead of facing the wound directly, it wraps it in belief, behaviour, or identity.
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SO, HOW IS NATIONALISM A COPING MECHANISM?
It often becomes a way to:
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1. AVOID PERSONAL FAILURE
> “I may feel small, but my nation is great. I belong to greatness.”
When a person feels powerless, unseen, or insignificant, they attach to a larger, idealised identity — the nation.
It’s a way of saying:
> “If I can't succeed alone, at least I’m part of something big, pure, historic, and powerful.”
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2. FILL EXISTENTIAL EMPTINESS
> “What is my purpose? Ah — to serve the motherland.”
When people don’t know what they’re really here for —
Nationalism gives them a ready-made meaning.
It replaces the painful search for personal meaning with a public slogan.
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3. MASK INNER CONFLICT
> “I’m angry. But I’ll aim it at outsiders.”
Nationalism helps redirect inner anger, shame, guilt toward an external “enemy.”
People stop asking,
> “Why am I hurting?”
and start saying,
“Who is attacking my nation?”
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4. ESCAPE FAMILY OR SOCIAL TRAUMA
> “My home is broken. But the nation is my family now.”
Many grow up with neglect, violence, or rejection.
They look to the nation like a surrogate parent or ideal home.
> “The nation loves me. It needs me. It makes me whole.”
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5. POSTPONE PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
> “I don’t need to fix myself. I need to fix the country.”
It becomes a way to bypass emotional growth, honesty, and healing.
> “I am fine. It's the others who are wrong. They are anti-national.”
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IS ALL NATIONALISM A COPING MECHANISM?
No.
Not always.
There is healthy pride and responsibility in contributing to collective good.
But when nationalism:
Becomes obsessive
Demands enemies
Makes people blind to their own flaws
Glorifies suffering or violence
Turns into “us vs. them”
Then it’s no longer about love for one’s country.
It’s about running away from oneself.
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A BRUTAL QUOTE
> “He couldn’t heal his childhood wounds.
So he painted them with the flag.
And called it patriotism.”
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